love, love, love, love, love....love.

Today was the first time I’ve been to church in about three Sundays. I’ve come to realize that is three Sundays too long. I’ve also let myself go as far as eating healthy and exercising. I had a pretty good routine going while living at my other apartment. But i know it’s been the holidays and schedules and routines have been altered and while that’s really no excuse, it’s the truth. I should be able to keep a routine in eating and exercising no matter what’s going on in my life. So, my goal is to get my health and spiritual life back on track. I haven’t been talking to God lately and after going to church today, I’ve realized how much I need Him. When I leave church I always feel so vulnerable and happy about it. I feel like I want to be a better person, improve on the things that I have been lacking in, wanting to discover and develop the things I don’t have a lot of strength in or confidence to find. I want to be able to put myself out there in the world and be something. I know that what I’m doing right now, i’m important, but all of what I’ve acquired has almost been handed to me on a plate in terms of jobs. I mean I might be shorting myself a little credit because I’ve excelled at those jobs and kept them but I guess I just don’t understand the situation that i’ve put myself into. It’s not a bad one, just not how I envisioned I guess. In church today, we talked about spiritual gifts and more specifically service. Pastor Chris was talking about some people in our church who have that gift and who serve unselfishly and give up their time without a second thought. They serve because serving means love. And loving is the most important thing we are to be doing. More recently I’ve been having an itch and burning desire to get the word “love” tattooed on my body...my temple...that God has blessed me with. I think that it has become so apparent to me that I need to love, love, love...no matter how difficult it is at the time. I’ve been trying to be more aware lately. The way I interact with people. Searching for ways to improve. Soon, it will be a new year and with that year, new things are coming. I will be hoping for a lot of growing and new opportunities. I will also be praying that God will guide me in everything I do. Or maybe I should be praying for the strength to LET God guide me. Who do I think I am anyways? lol. :) Cheers and happy new year!

unknown.

So, I hate when I get too frustrated that I can't focus on anything but what's bothering me. I hate that I get this way and how I sometimes can't control my feelings. The only way to remove myself from the current situation and pray that God takes my anger away. Or, I guess this is my way of venting when those people are in the same room with me??! It's so hard for me to share when I'm upset sometimes because it's usually not something that the person did necessarily but how i'm handling the information and responding. Usually I'm able to realize right away that it's not them, it's me and I don't get too upset...only at myself, but in this case I'm not feeling it was my problem, it was really them. Except after i've been typing this I feel incredibly calmer and not as angry. I love how this works. I'm glad I don't get angry too often.

In other news, Kai just told me what she's getting me for Christmas and it's tickets for us to go to the Rosie Thomas and Damien Jurado concert that's here in Seattle this Sunday! It's the same day as our Housewarming/Open House party. The party ends at 5pm and the concert starts at 830 so it's going to be a close call but we're going to make it happen, that's for sure. 

Also in addition to the list of events, my new apartment is pretty cool. I really enjoy living here and I always can't wait to come home and just be. Which it wasn't like that at my last apartment. I definately don't think I was cut out to live alone. I mean, I was technically rarely alone there but not living with at least some other person was kind of lame.

We're catching up on 24 season 6. Getting ready for the start of season 7 that starts sometime in January. I heard that it's a four hour season opener, split between two nights in a row. I can't wait. It's going to be an exciting season...per usual. Rachael and I got kind of burnt out from 24 for a while. We went through seasons 1-6.5 in about a month. I don't know how we stopped in the middle of a season. Kind of weird. We were trying to figure that out...but all that matters is that we're getting season 6 watched. As long as we're talking about tv shows, I'm 3/4 of the way through Arrested Development and man that's a funny show. I've always heard wonderful things about it and it always won so many awards when it was airing so I've been excited to watch it. The characters are SO weird and quirky but SO funny. Haha. I'm kind of bummed that it only lasted 3 seasons. The next shows I'd like to watch are Entourage, It's always Sunny in Philadelphia, and Gossip Girl. I don't know if everyone has heard of this but the website www.hulu.com has all the shows you'd ever want to watch and it's actually legal. The site is supported by all major networks so that's nice. I've heard that it's super up and coming and they are predicting that it's going to someday surpass YouTube. Yikes!

Ok well I think that's enough ranting for now. Until later I guess...